31 Days of Taking Good Care

The best angle from which to approach any problem is the try-angle. ~Author Unknown

A few months back I came across a great little website that offered a challenge called "31 days of Self Care" where participants are challenged to do something nice for themselves every day for a month and blog about it.    I contacted one of the site facilitiators and learned that this event occured in January and that they have a similar challenge each month with different topics like creativity and thankfulness. 

I thought this was a fabulous idea, and decided to create a self care girl version to begin in July.  The self care version looks like this:

• Set a goal.   It can be anything from walking a certain distance each day of July to spending 20 minutes a day in quiet contemplation.   Maybe you have been meaning to finish a quilt or to clean the garage, your goal may be to spend 30 minutes a day on that.   You get to choose whatever would be most meaningful in your life!
• Post your goal on the self care girl facebook page before July 1st (Look under discussions tab)
• Report back each day during July to provide status on your progress.

Studies show that people who write down their goals and tell others about what they are trying to accomplish are more successful in achieving thier goals.   Writing the goal down and announcing it gels your commitment, but the second part of telling others is that it lets other people encourage you and help you be successful.  

Having a daily goal is also important, because it allows you to refocus your energy on the goal each day.   I am currently participating in a program to walk 12,500 steps each day.   That is a lot of steps!  The true goal is to walk almost 500,000 steps in 6 weeks!  If I focus on the 500,000 I will most likely fail.   The 12,500 is definately a challenge, but not so daunting and I am finding it is quite do-able for me.

Another helpful hint: I am sure that most of us have set out with a goal like this:   Lose 10lbs in one month.   The problem with a goal like that it that we don't really have control of a parameter like our weight.  There are many factors that can interfer with weight loss, it is just not a good measure of progress and it can be quite defeating to get on the scale after losing 5lbs only to find that you are up 1lb after working your butt off all week! (Yes I speak from experience.)   Instead I recommend that you focus on a daily action that is within your control:  30 minutes on the Wii or 1 hour walk each evening- both can result in weight loss in the long run- but the activity is your goal and not the weight.  Got it?

Take Good Care!

Summer-izing Your Home

“Home is where you keep your stuff" - George Carlin

I am not a big fan of housework, but I am a big fan of having a tidy and comfortable home.  

We are cleaning house this weekend, moving furniture and doing our best to summer-ize despite part of our home being under renovation.  It really is our last opportunity to complete spring cleaning. 

How does one summer-ize their home?  I read somewhere that in summertime you should create more space by moving furniture further apart and leaving open spaces.  The open areas create a cooler, more carefree environment.  This makes sense when you consider advice from the same source suggests in winter you should do the opposite - pull furniture closer to create warmth and coziness.  

I am also pulling out my summer linens, some lavendar room spray and a few vases for flowers.

How do you summer-ize your home?

The Secret to Looking Good In a Swimsuit

“They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.” - Cindy Crawford

We are headed to Kauai in a week.   (***Happy Dance!)

Mr Self Care and I planned this vacation back in January and believed at that time that we could be ready for swimsuits and day hikes in Waimea Canyon by May.   Just needed to start working out and eating healthy...

We started...and we stopped...and we started again...and stopped.   Now here we are with a week left and I am certain that we are not in any better physical condition than we were in January when we started our campaign.

Sadly, there is nothing we can do at this point to remedy the situation.   We are fat and out of shape and no amount of starvation dieting or last chance workouts is going to fix that.   Our only consolation is that we are going to Kauai. (which is a pretty fabulous consolation, really).

I am sure that we are not the first or the last people who have experienced this.   The pre-vacation weight loss campaign is fairly common and typically fails (granted, some of us do make it to just after the vacation to change back to our old negative eating and exercise habits...)   It is clear that we need to establish a more compelling reason for lifestyle change than a single tropical holiday.

Mr Self Care and I agree that we should make a few changes this week because we don't feel too good physically.   It is certain that we will feel better come next Saturday if we do something beneficial to our health this week- even if we don't see dramatic results in our appearance.    So we did agree to be good this week.

While in Kauai, I am planning some extreme relaxation and rejuvination-this is the real reason for the vacation.   We may not look pretty in our swimsuits, but I have a theory that if we can find another couple that looks fatter than we do- we may slip under the radar (*insert evil laugh here).  

When we return, we will explore a more successful approach to improving our physical health.   For now I have compiled a little guide for anyone finding themselves in the same boat (where you feel as big as a boat) like we do.

How to Look Good In A Swimsuit When the Pre-Vacation Diet and Exercise Routine Failed:

1) Sit next to someone larger than you (it is an idea worth repeating)
2) Wear a wild hat or something to draw eyes upward and distract
3) Make sure you have a beautiful swimsuit, or at least a beautiful sarong or cover up
4) Get in the pool.   A pool of water hides a multiple of sins.  (of course you will have to get out again eventually...)
5) Focus on the fact that you are on vacation and the envy of everyone you left back at the office.   Studies (scientifically conducted somewhere I am sure) show that most people on vacation are more attractive because they are more happy and more relaxed. 
6) Smile, hold your head high, and don't be concerned about what other people think.  Confidence is beautiful.  Your true value lies in who you are on the inside.

Nobody's body is perfect (okay, a few are close to perfect- but they certainly have huge flaws elsewhere that you don't immediately see).   Be kind to yourself. 
If you have additional Swimsuit Survival tips, please let me know!

Going to my "Happy Place"

“Sometimes the most urgent thing you can possibly do is take a complete rest” - Ashleigh Brilliant

I slept in late this morning after going to bed fairly early last night.    Let me tell you how incredibly good that feels!

The stress level in our home is a little high right now - we had a construction project go bad and we lost a good sum of money in the deal.  I don't want to spend valuable post space going into all the details.   My point really is that sometimes bad stuff happens that is beyond our control and the stress and anxiety it causes can definately take its toll on our health and well-being.  

I think I have been near exhaustion lately.   My body has been sending me clear messages that I need to relax and take good care- and I confess I haven't been listening well.   The rest of our life continues on despite our setbacks and problems-you cannot just stop dealing with work, and managing your home and caring for your family....no matter how much you want to curl up in a ball under a down comforter and take a nap until everything returns to normal.

We are going on vacation to Kauai in a few weeks.  Having this on the horizon is definately a bright spot in our world.   But if we didn't have this (and definately, until I get to Kauai) I believe that it is critical for me to find some way else to get myself to my Happy Place. 

It is so very difficult to implement self care when you are in the midst of a crisis.   This is definately a lesson for me.   This is what I am doing to care for myself:

1) Breathe - deeply and slowly.   Focusing on your breath can help calm you.   Another technique is to inhale through one nostril and exhale through the other.  Do that 10 times and then switch nostrils.
2) Close your eyes and imagine yourself somewhere calm and serene.  Like a beach, or in a boat, lying in a meadow with Edward (for my Twilight friends).  
3) Go somewhere calm.   An art museum, aquarium or antique mall can be just the ticket to divert your attention
4) Escape into a book.  Put on some cozy pjs and grab yourself a pillow and a blanket.   There is nothing wrong with spending a day languishing with a book.
5) Spend some time snuggling with that special someone.  Hug a lot (Hugs help!)
6) Take a nap
7) Meditate
8) Pray
9) Practice Yoga
10) Create a space in your home that is just for you.  Fill your space with several objects that bring you peace and comfort.  Make sure you include something for all of your senses:  a picture of someone you love, a vanilla scented candle, soft music, a comfortable chair, a favorite soft blanket, your chocolat! stash. 

Got any other suggestions?   Please let me know!

The 5 year plan

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” - C.S. Lewis

I have been thinking very seriously about where I would like to be in 5 years. 

A lot can happen in 5 years, certainly.  A new opportunity may present itself, or something unexpected may befall us.      A 5 year plan is definately not to be written in stone.    It should be adaptable to our evolving perspectives and needs.

There is a high correlation between how far people plan into the future, and the level of success they achieve.  If you only live for the moment, you are probably not going to be prepared for those  life changing opportunities when they occur.    If you do not have some sort of destination in mind, you may wander aimlessly and never get anywhere.    (Although, I concede that wandering aimlessly is probably okay and good for you  in very small doses.)   In fact, without taking the time to sit down and come up with a plan, most of us will think about starting and almost none of us will actually take the first step toward making our dream a reality.

A few tips for writing your 5 year plan:

1. Imagine where you will be in 5 years.   Will your kids be grown?  Will you be retired?
2. Think about your ideal state.   Is there someplace you would like to see?  Is there something you have always wanted to try?  What skill or shape will you need to have in order to be successful?
3. Write down your goals.   Then say them out loud to a friend.   (Accountability!)
4. Break your goals into baby steps.   What will you need to accomplish in the first year?   the second? the third? fourth and fifth?
5. Begin.

The "DONE" List

For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.   -Fr. Alfred D'Souza

Here we are, again, at the end of another week and I have barely made a dent in the to-do list that I put together last Saturday.

Okay...maybe it was a really, really long and never-ending kind of to-do list....and maybe I was a tad unrealistic to think I could fit so many amazing accomplishments into just 7 days.....and YES,  I probably should have capped the list after Wednesday when I decided to added items #347) Make cookies for my kidlet, #348) Sell a condo and #349) Solve World Hunger.   (Can you guess which one I did actually accomplish?....sold the condo! YES!)

The problem with "to-do" lists is people usually omit those really beneficial tasks like "stay in bed all day and read" and "spent an hour in an adirondak chair getting some Vitamin D"   Important and rejuvinating tasks like (this is for Wanda) "harvest my Farmville crops" and "play a few rounds of Family Feud" never seem to make the "to-do" list cut.

I was thinking about this last night while looking at my current never ending list and it got me wondering how I was possibly going to relax this weekend when I have to item #243) Plant seeds, #287) Clean bird droppings of the back deck and #301) Clean the toilet, blaring at me for completion.

Quite frankly, this list of action items makes me feel bad.   I am overwhelmed with work to do and when I don't make progress I feel somehow inadequate - even when I know that the list is not humanly possible to achieve.

This week I am making two changes:

1. I am going to limit my to -do list  to 3 major tasks and one of these  3 tasks will be a "relax" task. 
2. I am also going to create a "DONE" list - and give myself a pat on the back when I complete those 3 tasks!

I will let you know how it goes!

Take Good Care!